NFL Drops Steaming Loaf On Pro Football, Institution Of Morality

“But Roger, isn’t beating your wife a much worse offense than deflating footballs?”

“What you’re forgetting that Brady didn’t actually deflate the footballs. He was just generally aware that someone else may or may not have deflated the footballs.”

“Isn’t that less severe?”

“I rule with a fckn iron fist.”

May 11th, 2015: a day that will live in infamy. Over 100 days after the deflategate investigation began, the NFL slapped on its square wheels and delivered the most unjust punishment in sports history. With no compelling evidence, they’ve suspended the greatest quarterback of all time for four games, fined the greatest franchise of the last 15 years one million dollars, and stripped them of their first round pick that they would’ve traded anyway.

You know what this is? This is punishing the Patriots for being too good. First it was altering the rule book to take away an offensive scheme that defenses couldn’t figure out, and now it’s punishing the Patriots because some football were allegedly barely over-inflated. And the quarterback knew, so he’s gone for four games.

Also, you’re either aware of something or you’re not. It’s black and white. There’s no other way to describe it. Tom Brady can’t be “generally aware” that the footballs were being under inflated. Define that for me Ted Wells. How can someone be “generally aware” of something?

Either Tom knew or he didn’t. And if he did, does it really matter? I’m about to bring out the same arguments that the anti-Patriot heretics have been stubbornly denying throughout this entire fiasco. Not even denying, but just flat-out ignoring.

IT WAS A 45-7 BLOWOUT WIN. FOUR RUSHING TOUCHDOWNS. BRADY DIDN’T HAVE A GREAT GAME.

Christ people what is the problem here??? Here’s some more:

MULTIPLE QUARTERBACKS HAVE ADMITTED TO TAMPERING WITH FOOTBALLS. ADMITTED. SAID THEY DID IT. SAID THEY BROKE THE RULES. NO PENALTY.

It’s come to the point where I have a problem with Roger Goodell and the NFL on a moral level. I still love the game and I’ll still watch it. I just have major issues with the way it’s run. Let’s have a league-wide breast cancer awareness month but give virtually NOTHING to breast cancer research. The NFL continues, time and time again, to make a mockery of itself.

nflsucks

I’m not even going to continue spitting the same concrete arguments against deflategate. Because no ones going to listen. Instead, let’s all listen to an investigation firm with no credibility and that came into this investigation with a private agenda. The same firm that said smoking tobacco does not cause lung cancer. Let’s listen to them, they’re probably right.

I say we storm NFL headquarters and tar and feather Roger Goodell, then take him onto the field at Gillette, tie a horse to each of his limbs, and fire gun. Then he’ll think twice about continually raising the bar for bonehead decisions.

#FireGoodell

#DefendTheFall

#Team12.5

P.S. We still have the ring. Like always, we’ll still have the last laugh. We’ll be laughing on the White House lawn this time next year.