ALL HANDS ON DECK: Coldplay’s New Album Is “About To Be Released”

coldplay ahfod

HAVE A WEEK CHRIS MARTIN! HAVE A WEEK!!!! First you get (allegedly) engaged, and now A Head Full of Dreams is (allegedly) around the corner. I’m (allegedly) wicked fucking excited now.

The man’s currently on a roll. Chris Martin, so hot right now, Chris Martin. He’s like a hot knife through butter. If this is 2K, he’s got two circles around him because he’s on fire. He’s got a beaut by his side and an album all about her coming at us. He’s making everybody happy…except the wench known as Gwyneth.

chris martin dunk

I feel like this needs to be obligatory from now on.

The album has been described as an LP full of songs that “will be fun to shuffle your feet a little bit” to. Probably because Chris is gettin’ with JLaw; I too would be shuffling my feet all day long if that was the case with me.

So when they eventually tour, I hope that translates to Xylobands coming back. For those of you who don’t know what those are, they’re the LED wristbands that they gave audience members on the MX tour a few years ago. A few other artists have utilized this same idea, including Taylor Swift on her current 1989 Tour. Just remember: Coldplay thought of it.


But the tour answers will come when the tour rolls around. The real question at hand now is: when’s A Head Full of Dreams dropping?

I’m gonna say late 2015. It can compete with Adele (if she drops her upcoming album) and it’ll be nice to have before Christmas. Either that, or towards the very start of 2016. I’m thinking pre-Super Bowl. But I’m still hopeful that we’re getting this before the calendar turns to January 1st, considering that the group is rumored to be touring Brazil in March 2016. Once they drop an album they tend to take a number of months before touring; January to March would be a shorter wait from album to tour than usual. Hey, the sooner the better.

It’s good to hear some news from the Coldplay front not relating to Chris’ personal life for once though. As much as I love to hear that he’s slaying life, I get impatient when I don’t know the status of their prospects (more lile prospekts…amirite Coldplay fans?). But my needs have been satisfied. Carry on, boys.

OH WAIT ONE MORE THING GUYS: make sure that there’s no tambourine songs on the new album.